Series of unfortunate events.

Hell yeah, a fucking bad week.
To start off first, which was probably the main reason that provoke this much of thoughts that will be putting into this post, is my really reckless, careless, unfortunate bail in school. What it is? Bailed lache gainer, faceplants, grazed into the playgrounds mats, cuts and abrasions, scratches caused by my specs, even worse, disfigured ugly face. What happened? Released too early, didn't pull up for height for my lache gainer, tucked but the gainer is going downwards and very forward, causing one of my worse bail I think I've suffered. What a way to start February. Why? Never focus, overconfident, just whack, not aware of the consequences, careless, unlucky, stupid, and never focus. Before that, I landed a very poor lache gainer, then I got one with good height but uncontrolled landing, the third attempt was the serious injury.

Why must it happened.. how fucking careless and somewhat reckless of me. I bailed. Wait. I bailed, YET AGAIN. And what a place to do it, in school. I really felt like rewinding time then but was quick to realize the reality. Sucks. A moment's folly resulted in utter disappointment and regret. If you guys read my blog since the past, you will know this is not the first time such stupid incidents occured. But then, since things are already done, no point dwelling. Thing is, I hardly learn from my stupid mistakes. When will I learn my lesson? The stuffs that I've lost in Clementi. Did I learn my lesson? I still live my stuffs lying everywhere. Seriously man, I can't get things to stick permanently into my mind. After about a few months, sometimes even just weeks, I'll take things for granted again. So dumb.

One thing I realize. My school friends didn't make much noise. Rather showed some concern, no one made fun of me, looked at me like an asshole. They didn't go like "parkour again ah, then kena your face?", they said things like "what happened, what you do". I expected something stupid and irritating. This means, I think we do think badly of those typical humans, maybe some mats and stupid irritating people do so, but not all. We shouldn't generalize thing. It looks like we are the one thinking badly of them, not them thinking badly of us. Teachers did make noise, but they are like that, don't really care about them though. Parents are much more understanding now. Father said stuffs like, "you wanna do this stuffs also can, but learn to be safe, do stuffs in your capability." Not that bad, expected worse scoldings.

------Hold on. Edit. Seems like I was wrong. A couple of friends did in the end made fun of me after knowing what I did. Thought they would understand. Words goes "wanna act cool harh?" "*laughs non stop* that is so idiotic only stupid people will do that". I obviously feel pissed but yeah, realize that there is no point.. Still there are a few that understands and didn't made much noise. Was a very careless mistake at that point, I wonder when will I do another lache gainer.. To be honest I still think lache gainer is really easy, I've tried it on low bars, tried it with one swing, I could still land them nicely. Even if I bail lache gainers, the worse is on knees and hands, but still, I've rotated and still see the ground. But this time round, was horrible.

Let me think of my worse bails. One whole list, I know.
The sdc to underbar at Marine Parade, just force my legs to go through, never pull hard in the underbar, head knocked to the edge of the floor, head bleeds.
Twice in one day at sculpture park, really deep shin scar and bruised back, slip in my crane and gashed my shin, fingertips slipped in a catleap, falling back first 1metre down onto concrete.
Back in the poser days, really dive into an sdc to get distance, hands slipped, landing with my pinkie onto concrete, finger dislocated.
50 attempts wallpass, just to get one on film, failed horribly, knee pain. Not really a bail, but still stupid. This was a classic.
Another faceplant back in 2007, tried a frontflip at the beach of somehting, overrotated, face fall hard soon after my legs went into contact on the sand. Not much of a big deal but very dumb still. Bishan with Ish, slipped in an sdc. Castle while balancing, foot missed the rail, face hit the rail. More and more other bullshits.
There's still more of such bails. Alot more. But the rest are minor. Minor doesn't means good. Blane doesn't bail. Much others don't bail. They don't even impact themselves much. Why? Good control over their body, good focus, don't push limits too much, safety first.

I seriously should learn that for everything, you need to focus, no matter the conditions. Don't go blind and don't think about what you are doing. I wanna adapt the mindset that you can't afford to bail at all costs. Whether it is high risk low risk, in flips, in rail precisions, in huge catleaps. Not only bail, but everything I do, I better land, don't miss a move. Those kind of mindset. If I don't think I can land this running precision all the time, then I don't do it. When I do it, I make sure I nail it, and not far back. Or at least fall back down into a cat, so it won't be a miss or something. Maybe just one attempt, but thats all. If I can't means I can't so no point in keep doing it. I can't afford to bail. Not one move should I miss, bail, clip, slip. My training should be kept low impact from now on. Strength training routine is coming up. Last thing I want is more injuries.

Another thing I wanna train on is, my wallpasses, especially the part when I'm climbing up. I think most people think the key for fast wallpasses is good climbups. But no, its leg coordination. Upperbody strength will help but people should realize using overgrip and forearms makes going up much more faster and easier and the kickup is super important. I should start training on reps just hanging with one hand on the wall, and rush to get up and over it.
Wanted to put more focus on more efficient things. Not that I practice pure parkour, but just want to get speed. Many people fail to realize the fact that SDCs are not parkour, neither most of their things are. Precisions, SDC2P and balance. I wonder when will people learn to understand. They can be efficient at times. But does that makes it parkour? Maybe they are just too brainwashed.

Only 2 out of the 27 workouts is done, with each workouts getting harder and more intense week to week, spreading for 9 weeks. As this is the first week, things are easy, but its gonna be a killer to withstand week 3, let alone week 4, 8 and week 9. You guys probably don't understand all this so don't bother, hahaha.
But yeah I really need to take more days off for rest and focus on proper strength training. It's gonna get way tougher down the weeks, and I don't want to miss any reps. I wanna make something out of this routine. Proper pysching up before 5rms or whatever as well.

Taking more rest means less movements training. But doing 15 backflips a day won't hurt. I was thinking of training backflip at home. I wanna get the movement of the backflip hardwired into my system. I could whack ok-ok backflip on concrete anytime I want now, which is good for now, the next thing I want to focus on is height and good technique. I decided to train on Tuesdays and Saturdays for movements, while keeping Thursdays and Sundays for full day rests.

My palm is abit bruised, my knee suffered a pretty painful abrasion. The cause of it, during my walk to school yesterday. Its rather traumatic, I was crossing a zebra crossing and was walking really slowly and I thought this motorbike will stop. I walked slowly because when it came closer it didn't look like it is going to stop. But it didn't stop and it banged into me. Seriously. No joke. One thing dumb is that why I didn't avoid it and dumb dumb let it hit me, because I was staring at the bike all the while. Maybe because I thought it is a zebra crossing and I'm not wrong walking slowly. I can handle a motorbike crash, which is weird, luckily it wasn't a car or not I wouldn't be here right now. But I got a stupid abrasion which hurts like hell.. fuck the motorist seriously should learn that even in a zebra crossing, learn to stop no matetr how slow the pedestrain is crossing. Damn traumatic, because it happened out of nowhere, and it went straight into me but I still managed to move, and luckily it was a car, and somemore I was just awake.. fuck I hate this feelings.

I still think my frontflips needs alot of work, same as my other flips. I think people think flips are rather easy but when you actually think about it, they are very hard, especially hard to land them floaty and with good technique, form, and confidence. Consistency is another problem. I think all the tricksters gone through the same thing, uncountable number of repetitions each training, till their flips are very solid. Thats the only way.. no choice. Sideflips are getting there.. almost there. Must keep practicing, keep drilling. I will, in time to come, have the standard of flips that I'd like.

I realize theres still many thing that I need to work on. Handstands have been neglecting alot. I feel that I'm really lazy to train my handstands, sometimes I don't feel any progress in them, which sucks. But I still do them occasionally. I seriously should start working on them if I wanna get them down this year. This needs discipline. And you know what, I think my rolls aren't good at all. Never been practicing them consistently. Still not totally used to them and sometimes I still need to think of pointers before doing them, not 2nd nature yet. Stupid man.

In school, everytime during recess I do flips after eating. I think I'm attracting too much attention. I wanna be a little more low profile. People do realize that I go fitness corner alone too, then train alone. Never socialize, never interact. In class, I hardly talk much as well, just the normal guys that I go with. Girls, don't know what subject to talk about. I lack social skills, communicative skills. I can hardly make a conversation last long, nothing else to talk about. I don't have much initiative, don't have much courage. Don't talk to everyone, just selected few. Can't keep eye contact, can't keep a proper face expression, can't contain an awkward silence. Quite sad eh? I think I should give it a fuck to the fitness corner thanks to the bail obviously, and go play soccer. Much safer, much more 'human'. Need to just chat more and go out more with my friends. This is the last secondary school year for me. I don't want to regret it. Friends are definitely important. Do need to understand my presence in life. So need to. But I shouldn't be too sensitive.

Money, I've gotten about $220 in my bank account. My mother took 300 of my scholarship money. I didn't make noise, but she'd better return me my money, I wanna get a microphone and wide angle lens soon. She'd also better return me my 400 bucks from my pay at Mac. Those were my own money, I got all rights to keep it for the things I want. Which is to travel to overseas. Thinking of this subject makes my blood boil. Its so retarded.. why parents don't understand of kids wanting to save up and keep money for themselves?

Food. I think my nutrition is somewhat OK now, eating more proteins now that I need alot more of them. I think I should vary my diet a little more just so I won't get bored of it. Chicken stays though. Vegetarians are stupid, zhiyang is gay.

I've been downloading more snowboard movies. I wanna watch them to my delight. I wanna film more artistic timelapse, random shots, and compile into a huge list then use it when I need it. Like mentioned. I want a mic and wide lens. Mic for documentary and better sounds, widelens for effectiveness. Working on a small video now, in process of editing. Nothing much, just a mess about. Also working on Freds, Stephens and.. Ashton's showreel.. when will the time come?

I've received news that Alex Winslow, Calum Lynch-Strachan, Joe Parker will be coming to Singapore this July. Awesome. Thanks to Ish to be honest, that he persuaded those guys to come visit the spots and us. Never thought I would have the chance to meet them. Those guys are quite popular if you guys don't know then too bad. They are pretty fucking talented. Qayyim and Sabree to meet us during April. Cool eh? More visitors. Dblucy said about the Kuwait guy coming to Singapore again during August? Rhys James and Shuan Wood would follow Ish to come to Singapore too but not sure when. Would be soooo sick. Can't wait for this events.

I wanna go to Bishan and Buangkok to train again.. good spots. I wanna find more potential in those two areas. All I can say those two spots rocks. If I were to travel, this two places will be my first choices.

Studies are still fine. Nothing too stressful still. Can cope with things.
Time management. Is crap. Sleep times are messed up. I want to sleep at about 11 latest, now its 11.30. Don't know what am I doing in the computer too at times. Watch video, listen to songs, talk talk talk in MSN, don't know what else. Never take the time out and learn more on video editing, clearing up my hard disk space. Always do homework last minute. Waste so much time blogging.. time is precious.

To sum up. I will be taking a break from movements training for about a week. Just to get my injuries settled. Then focus on restarting anew.
As always, I hope for a better week next week.