Traceurs and Their Delusion.

Thinking about it now...
Traceurs are so blinded by reality. Most of them, not all, but really think... are you guilty as charged?

Single-handedly by far the most delusional intent of a traceur... making a video. Most traceurs are making, getting a camera just to film and create their own videos, causing alot of hype and all. Purpose? Definitely not just 'fun'. If so, how is it not stupid to impact oneself just for creating the most epic video on earth, what's more at the cost of your used-to-be healthy joints.

I think a proper video should be showing every single movement is something I can actually do at the first attempt. Save for some last minute hesitation of accidental cockups, but as long as 90% of the time you can do it, rather easily, that's what a good video supposed to be like... the first shot from the camera = the clips in the video. (except for camera filming cockups...)
That's actually what we should aim for in training, to get everything in the first attempt. Movements near maximum should be reserved for pushing yourself days only - on rare occasions. DEFINITELY not for showing off, thats just suicide.

If you know you can do it, doesn't mean you should actually do it. Only when you are fully confident you can control it, that's when you can give it a shot. Something about SDC is that I always overestimate how far I can go with it and take it as if its not impactful to go full swing. No need to mention anything about wallpass or the impact delivered up your knees each failed attempt.

Showing off, part of human ego? Somehow I feel that traceurs think that they are stronger then the 'typical humanoids'. Probably stronger then pure sedentary ones, but we still have alot to work on. My functionality in strength resulting for Pk to real life is minimal, how am I supposed to believe I'm strong? How 'strong' it is really to jump over distances and climb gracefully, with speed? How 'strong' it is to pullup over 20kg and drive your hips up over 90kgs on your shoulders in a squat? But in the streets, you can't handle a punch, you can't handle endurance running, you can't even carry and move heavy objects or carry out the simplest of tasks... how embarassing to mention that you're strong. Self-defense is a skill, much more applicable then any other activities in life.

I forgot to mention how elitist our clique are. Self proclaimed 'higher-class' traceurs. We are damn egotistical, face it. Actually, don't just say the more experienced batch, just traceurs in general (however, not all, they are handful of humble ones). Just look at some newcomers, they feel as if they are so good, they HAVE to be respected, any (even minor) insults are taken as if a stab in their reputation. Thus they rebutt to your (rather harsh but truthful) replies thinking they you ain't any better, or 'if' you are, they'll think you're a big shot. Just like us, everytime we see a newcomer doing stupid things, we don't try to correct, instead we try to disgrace them, badmouthing them behind their backs. And we hardly try to teach anyone properly, and label much of newcomers as posers.

Saying that parkcore is non-competitive but yet, truly in their hearts, some of them are still competitive. People only trying stuffs after people doing it, always, all the time... and not trying to find their own way. Really?

Alright having stated that, let's not just point fingers and each other, and ponder among yourself.
Really having realised things, I don't know still why can such stupidity occur, at all.

Guilty of showing off. Whether subconsciously or consciously, its difficult to hide...
Guilty of impacting myself unnecessarily, rushing to do stuffs way beyond my league...
Guilty for re-committing mistakes I've foolishly done in the past...
When people's around, a tendency to do something. Truthfully, I wanted to do the dash because I thought it was possible. Looks stared, and fuck, I start to feel that I'm doing it to showoff, because thats how I portray myself to be. My conscience states, I wanted to do the dash. Purpose of getting it film, a milestone of progression and of course telling myself that I've done so, or check for improvements. But I feel like I'm showing off. Subconsciously. That's not utterly bad I guess, because I don't purposely try to want to gain attention, because I know even if I'm alone I'll do it. In fact, I should spend less time filming. It makes you feel like you are getting it on film to showoff that you can do it.
Memories flickered through my mind... what happened to me knee because of that stupid wallpass attempts - near 50 times. For? Getting it on film. For? Attempting to impress.
Impacts are not worth. You are gonna last not for long, and that defeats the purpose altogether. Pushing yourself is good, but too harshly is never. Be aware of yourself and your limits, and be in control of every single movements. IF you know its far beyond your limit to control that movement, then don't. Flips different case though.

CP, please wake up.
Hopefully that's the past and you get your mindset rinsed.

Should anyone approach me and question the reason why I make a video now, or train Parkour, I must be able to answer it reasonably, properly, without any hesitation (and of course honestly, not some made up reasons). That's a show of your clarity in whatever you are doing. That's one problem I have, I can't seem to be able to answer things from scratch, split seconds, and that's why I suck in debates.
----
Why do I train 'movements':
Of course, the freedom being experienced, and the understanding of the ability of humans to be constantly break barriers. Purpose? No particular purpose. I just love moving, the feeling each time I do something, achieve something, makes me feel alive.
Flips, serves no way applicable in real life, but so is much of PK. I feel flips is another form of expression, just in rotations, twists, inversions. Fear control.
Why am I really willing to risk my life, and maybe cut short half of my knees lifespan, is because if you consider and typical human being, whose life is to eat alot but yet not stay active, my knees are certainly grow stronger than them. I rather live a life of value, of experiences, and if I die, I will be appeased, knowing when I'm old, I'll be looking back at my videos and tell myself how much I have achieved, something to be proud and happy about, and am willing to face the consequences of whats to come. I'm not saying this so I can just disrespect my body, but it is the fact to know that joint problems are near inevitable.

Weight training:
If you see how much I tend to make weight training to reason to get strong as opposed to conditioning, you know why and how serious am I towards this. And how much I throw away the false accusations of stunt growth due to it. I do squats because, its also another passion, not just a supplementary exercises. Again, being strong includes with and without weights. Main reason still, it is to show that no matter how tough the weights rested upon your shoulders is, the feeling of recruiting every single muscle fibers to execute your maximal strength and power output, one shot, AHHHHHHHHH and you're up, maintain the form and all, that feeling, beats most things hands down. Shows how powerful your body is, and that feeling of boosting your 1rm by Kgs each time round, shows that the impossible never was impossible. I don't do weights for appearance. PLease.

Videos:
Another form of expression. I love being creative as much in video editing and in PK. Translating my thoughts into video form, without any rules or restrictions to comply to, letting people see my creation. Hopefully being intrigued by it. Its about what you do with a simple camcorder, and put together with a video editor, to come up with a fine piece of arts. Everything comes with an interest, and this is mine. I seriously need to start working on short films not just PK and PK and PKKKK.
PK videos are made to showcase progression, but that in mind, I shall be wary to not exceed my limits just to get a good shot on film. If you can't there's no need to force. And to connect with the people in other countries, have seemed to work out quite well, like gaining popularity of our spots. And traceurs have a worldwide bond, I want to share my video with the world. Showing the world what's possible, inspiring people. I love making videos and since I can combine both interests, this could be a starting point of development towards my future filmmaking career.
---------
Few things to note: Work on rolls, muscleups, handstands, controlled landings in drops and cranes, wallpasses. Gym thrice a fortnight, do homeworks, stop wasting time, practicing handstands, sleep on time, train flips hard after school.
One weekday train, Sunday gym, Saturday slack, One day full swing studies, the rest balance out.

Blog's Stagnance

Not on purpose. Just that I don't feel that there's alot to be blogged about and I'm pouring my thoughts out on my 'personal' blog, where I am posting so much more there as compared to here, because probably I'm no longer thinking of being secretive of my life. So what if people know. But that doesn't mean I want to get more unwanted attention, that's why the training logs of mine are kept in its original place (here). But probably you people should read the other blog too... if you want.

Recent trainings, let me think.
Park core wise I would think it is really improving, especially in precisions (on rails even) and the running armjumps at castle. Wallpass still kinda inconsistent, climbups getting back on form, 180s (cat2cat/pres) are improving massively, catpass at a new higher level (with so much ease @ shinos now), laches are losing power (probably due to lack of practice). Strides more confident, runs are faster, confidence level improving, as my belief is strong (being able to do most movements as height without much hesitation, after awhile), also knowing my limits better. Gotten running precisions are Bishan and Dame Du Lac shows that I'm improving in leg strength. Bails are less (though not completely eradicated). Of course with everything there's area for improvements, that is with rolls, and landings. Rolls is really poserish, as until now I'm not fully confident, and landings are still quite loud at times, not well absorbed. Lost my crane at tree garden, and my crane ain't very strong too.
So three things to work on, rolls and wallpasses and cranes.

Flips wise, can say pretty much the same. I've gotten higher sides, side-to-sides, more comfortable fronts, ok on concrete and being able to do most of the time, albeit sideways sides. Backflips are still weird though. One of the flips I've havent fully figured. Its always moving to the side, and my roundoff back is really off, low. roundoff - another thing that I need to work on. Wallflip, bailed once, probably lost confidence, but I've never been confident with that before. Unable to get height, feels weird and scary, lots of things to work on. Fixing the rotational axis and expanding my repertoire of tricks, the things that top my flips to-do lists. Also, combining flips with Peekay outside.
Handstands can say have improved, but it feels really inconsistent.

Strength training at gym. Haven't got there much, less than 3times each fortnight, but it is all good. Squats have still been the same, of course, pretty much because I've never been training. But still leg strength is improving. Got a napfa test for a shirt thing, got 266cm, furthest ever I've jumped, which is obviously badly landed and probably 98% full force. I feel back pains yesterday, weirdly. A sign for me to stop impacting myself and strengthen my back even more, rest and stretch and some fish oil. So need to train on deadlifts (not maximal though). I'm thinking of the exercises I should do when I'm just aiming to maintain strength... still got lots to learn about strength training. Also, what routine should I undertake when O's are over. I'm still aiming for the ultimate goal 100kg squat x1. Doubtful that I can nail an OAC though.

Nutrition-wise, my weight stands at 52.8kg today, but waxes and wanes between 52 to 53.8(max recorded). I think I should watch my weight a little, not that I'm so vain about fats and stuffs, but hopeful to eliminate most unnecessary bodyfats as possible, so it'll help in my movements. Muscle mass are inevitable, but ain't that bad, hopefully. I hope people don't get the wrong idea that I train for muscles, because really, the results of them are all these trainings. Hmm maybe cut down on chicken skin, big portions of rice, hash browns, oily foods, and eat more fish, noodles or things.

thats all.