New Years Resolution.

I've been thinking about the things I want to do next year. I can see my progress for this year, just this year alone, its remarkable. If I were to work towards my goals and have a clear mind of what to aim for, probably my progression will be faster, and go the right direction. And since its my OLevel year, I probably can't train as much as I want to, so I would just want to get alot stronger by training in the gym as thats the only place I can train. Thats the main focus of the year (other then studying), is to get alot alot stronger.

So yeah, strength training is my priority. Goals for it - break the 2x BW squats milestone and work up to a OAC (for both arms). Those are the main goals, most important goals. The other goals are subjective, of course I want my lifts to improve, but then I have no specific numbers for it.

Also the second priority next year is working on my flips. I always wanted to flip, but I never trained them seriously. Its like I kept procrastinating when I told myself to work on flips. I don't know why, its either because I lack motivation to train for them, or I'm still not too used to flipping and fear keeps pulling me away. Whatever it is, I want to be able to move in all kinds of way, and flips are one type of movements that I aspire to do. I really don't go out of my comfort zone much, always sticking to pharkcore and SDCs which are my strengths. I need to work on the things I suck at, so as to get better and used to them. I want to at least get the basics into my system. Backflip, frontflip especially, then work my way to the other higher level movement. I hope to just get every opportunity to practice my flip during recess in school. I need to get those flips into my muscle memory, like my parkour movements. And the only way to do that is to keep repeating them.

Other movements that I want to work on and that is out of my comfort zone is handbalancing. I do want to be able to do a good solid handstand, being able to control my handstands whether it is staying still and walking about, and can save it when it is out of balance 95% of the time. Get to do some handstand presses, and be flexible enough on my wrist and hamtrings and strong hip flexors to do l-seats to handstand. I'll also be working on bodyweight strength feats so as to not be just strong with weight. Also, 360 precisions and catleaps. Just get used to twisting and have control in midair too. Of course bar tricks, reverse vault for distance, palmspins, railwork and all this goes.

Now you get my MSN personal message - twisting (360s), invertions (handstands), rotations (flips).

Next year will be the year where I get alot stronger and more better in my flips (or freerunning, whatever it is). I want to keep drilling the moves that I'm weak and scared in, be consistent in the stuffs in my past videos or moves that I can already do. Its not gonna be easy, but I have no choice but to work hard if I want to be able to do stuffs in 2010. And this year I could also rest abit from Parkour and work more on flips, so there will be lesser impacts to my body.

Sadly reading my training diary for the goals I wrote to achieve by the end of this year, I didn't achieve much. 2x BW squats deadlifts, wow I can't believe I was so ambitious. But next year, I really hope I can hit that, as long as my weight stays below 55kg. I got straight armed climbups, but didnt got planche en force or 1/2BW pullups (I actually could but I haven't tried so I wouldn't say I could). Didn't get handstands too. My flips wasnt consistent. But I do know how to do a variety of lifts. The other goals are mostly how I see my training, like stop being regretful after training, to be more sensible and self controlled. I'm not confident enough to say a yes so I think it is a no. This shows how my goals are too ambitious and mostly because I never work hard enough to it. I should start making sensible, realistic goals.

Oh well its like 4 more days away from the reopening of school, and that really really sucks, I can't believe how fast time flies, days goes by like nothing, hais, O levels are coming soon, so I should really work hard in my studies, I don't want to regret in the future. I hope the year ahead would be a wonderful one.

My new years resolution - focus more on studies, focus more on flips, focus more on gyming. And to be a better person overall.

I'm gonna use this blog as a personal blog from now on, I don't really care about the other blog anymore. Anything else out of PK that I want to crap about, it will be here.. this is my life blog.

Year in Review

I'm gonna write a review of the year 2008, looking back at this year, month by month, and conclude it in the end, discussing about the goods and bads, the obstacles I've been through, achievements and downfalls, not only in PK, but in studies, families, life in a whole. The following craps might sound, like crap to you, but you think I care?

January
Can't remember much for the first few months, but PK wise I've did wisen up alot, expose myself to more stuffs. Also, I can remember I struggled like fuck in my studies, LIKE FUCK. I got 0 for my Amaths test out of 21. Chinese struggled throughout.

February
I think I did about a month of 50 repetitions of my catleaps, precisions, vaults, after that month I felt tremendous improvement. Proved to me repetitions really works, and thinking back, why am I not repeating the stuffs that I'm doing. I think the real reason why my SDC is damn good is because of the number of time I've practiced them. I really can't remember much else, this feels like so long ago but its actually only 10 months..

March
I made a video this month which proved to be something that gotten me some recognition. The video is currently the most viewed video of mine, and the video of the end of this year that I'm gonna make is hopefully gonna crash that. 2010 breakthrough video would own all of my videos combined, thats my goal. Ok this month I felt alot of improvement which can be seen in the video. Practiced alot of runs which was the highlight of the video. All I can say my studies is still crap at this point.

April and May
Training goes on as usual. This few months are probably the most mundane of ALL months.. I don't know anything that happened here, except my exams for May, which I think I did reasonably well.. Let me check my old blog post.. lol.
Ok actually this month I suddenly found my way, and realize I don't practice PK, but L'art du displacement.. And of course the 17th and 18th Jam.. Amazing jam with Qayyim and the other guys, one of the most funnest jam ever.. Bought a training diary. I can't remember much else. Whatever.

June
I went to Vietnam for the first week of my June Holidays, memorable experience, first time on the plane, first time overseas. Came back, I felt very moodless to train, not sure why. My skills are still there definitely, I don't think I'm rusty, but lose motivation. I was planning to make a video, so filmed stuffs throughout the holidays. The holidays was a really quick one, but one crapped happened before July started. I die die wanted to get the wallpass at simei for the video in May July. Fucking hell, I didn't know it was so hard. It took my countless of tries, lefting the camera there to operate for minutes and minutes.. 50 attempts +/- mostly not even close. I gave up in the end, feeling the sore in my knee, which I already felt earlier on, but kept on trying. This ended up for a long time, till November is it totally gone.. I guess. Only bright thing in this month is that I got to meet a couple of new faces to PKSG, Zhiyang, Dblucy, Fred.

July
Was in a total mess, going to the docs, finding doctors, icing it daily, hardly get to train. Rest for two weeks, went back to gym, worsened its condition. I can't even do squats, amazing. And during that time I hardly did anything which is like wtf. I really hate that. This month is one of the most stagnant month since I ever stepped into PK. Knee condition wasn't never OK until September... but thats not anytime soon.

August
I was busy recuperating, only did watched videos everytime I came back from school. Yet again exams are coming, about to. The first obstacle of this month was that I lost my belonging when I went to Clementi with Glen and Ashton and Gab. Really pissed off, my camera, amaths txtbook, ipod, wallet, hp, they went missing. Thinking back, wow, fucking wasted. Hais. But really thanks to Tutu, he helped me got this fucking awesome 2k camcorder, I feel really guilty not treating him even better. I should do so now.. hais. Guilt. I did go back to strength training for abit, movements gotten abit rustier but its a good cause, I stopped Parkour so I won't impact myself, body getting back to business.

September
Finally my knee seems to be working fine, went back to strength training, as to build up my strength before training PK again. They are awesome, feels so good back to training, first real routine, learnt alot throughout. I didn't do much of PK, but helped to filmed Dblucy's sampler.
As I started training, exams are around the corner, stress are building up. During this month, something happened to my family, which gotten into serious trouble...

October
Exams starts, really stressful period but yet I continued with strength training, which turns out to be not a hindrance in my studies. I actually scored pretty well compared to May, and some much more imporvement from the start of the year (and the past year). Already gotten past my previous Squats 3RMs and I'm starting to get back to PK training, but light training. Knee cocks up but it heals pretty soon. This month is also the time where I look ahead of my future, plan my statement, train with a goal in mind. My birthday jam was another memorable episode of my life. Probably the best birthday ever. Then soon, its november.

November
I finished my routine with an awesome 76kg 5rm, I get to go out with more of the PKSG traceurs this month, Holidays started, started to train PK more and more, can see the tremendous improvements squats done to my movements. And theres the huge PKSG jam at Bishan. I dont know much of else, just my knee gotten healed pretty good. Enjoyed the time as I'm out of school.

December
This month hadn't finished, but I can say I'm really happy with the standard I'm in now. I'm getting stronger everyday, mentally and physically. Got a couple of awesome jams already, and still waiting for the jam to end the year. Recently I've bailed more than usual, which is retarded and bad, something that I need to fix, yet again. Also, started to film more clips for the video that I'm gonna release soon.

Overall.. I can say this is a pretty good year. Learnt from mistakes, brighten up alittle, seen more of life and the bads. In school, I gotten the meet better friends unlike the past class, quitted NCC, now going to school isn't necessary a misery. Although theres are some fights here and there, rivalry, hatred, I can say theres no trouble amongst friends. Studies, I think I'm coping OK, after awhile to adapt to Sec3 standards. Next year will be my O level year and I expect alot of the stuffs there to be even more stressful and harder, as I prepare to end my Secondary School life... hopefully happily.
Also for my movements, I think this year is the year where I finally get into PK or whatever the name of the thing I'm doing is. I know I'm gonna stick to this till the day I die. Also improved alot, very happy with the standard I'm in, strength training is going damn well too, squats improved so much, get acclimated to gyming. Although theres a big mistake during June, I really learnt my lesson and definitely must listen to my body.
Filming definitely improved and editing too. I wanna make just two movies next year, one documentary, and just an cinematic trailer-like video thingy (not confirmed though). Just get prepared for the video that I'm gonna release, haha.

As I've written alot of craps now, I think I'm gonna stop, and I'm gonna make a New Years Resolution post soon.

More craps.

Yesterday was the Xmas jam, didn't got much clips from it so I will probably do a video with crap editing and post it on my denester1 account. Did learnt some stuffs from the jam though. First one is my SDC2P at Clarke Quay, got it nailed, which was my goal for this year. Actually I could see my SDC improving quite well. Also, the standard of PKSG traceurs (the new generation ones) are amazing, with Stephen, Zhiyang, Dblucy, Jordan, Fred, they are super good and improving very fast. I'm talking about their skills though, mindset, to some people, I'm not too sure, but its ok. Dblucy is improving incredibly fast, same for Zhiyang and Stephen. Quite amazed by their speed of progression.

Got a couple of bruises from yesterday jam, because of knocking my knee on to the wall in my running crane at ashton's spot and SDC2cats at Clarke Quay. Thats one thing I need to work on right now. My running crane sucks, I wanna be able to land it properly some time later. I think I should really learn how to jump UP, fuck UP, not forward like fuck. Still just can't get it into my system. Also now that I feel I'm into quite a good level with my skills, I wanna start getting more control in my movements. Even if I can go so far with my SDC and shit, without control, it isn't really something to be happy about.
One thing about PhilyDee that I like is, he gets very far in his SDCs and running precisions and all this stuffs, but he got control over them, lands it nicely and silently, rail precisions and good as hell, he is very fast, and has control over his power. Thats what I want to aim for - controlled power, or powerful control. Lulz.

I can feel that my frontflip and my handstands improved, just a slight improvement though, and my backflips are still crap. Flips are something that I will be practicing on alot thats for sure, now that I feel my Pak-cool is up to a satisfactory standard. I should allocate more work on the things I suck at. Also I don't wanna keep pushing my movements so much, its really stressful and like I said I just wanna 'perfect' the things that I'm already capable of and train for control. Especially for my precisions.

Well I think my SDC is still the strongest of all other movements, and I've train it to a point I've nailed all the goals I wanted to nail, so now for SDC there isn't anymore goals (as in goals that I wanna nail soon, there are one day goals for it though). I think the Clarke Quay SDC2P still isn't my furthest or what, its just the fear that held me back alot. But I think I don't wanna keep pushing my SDC for now, just maintain it and getting them consistent. On the other hand, my wallpasses aren't that good yet, and are bloody inconsistent. I wanna nail some walls in my area and get them consistent and good. The rest I just wanna practice them, repeat them, thats all.

Time is passing by really quickly, and everyday seems like a same cycle. Wake up play comp, eat, train, go out, all kinds of same stuffs. School reopens, I can't stand the teachers and the schoolwork I foresee coming. Whats more it is O level year, so much more stressful and work will all get harder. It sucks man, totally. I can say I hate school and all such shits but in the end I still ought to, and HAVE to study and go to school, and face the retarded teachers and retarded education. 2 months fly past us like nothing, like just a few weeks. Next year I'll be have strength training routines, which will make time fly even faster somehow, and then in just awhile, I see myself in the school hall taking the torturous Olevel exam. Its fucking stressful bullshit, that's why I hate Singapore, fucking highly competitive country.
Talking about school, I just remembered that I have yet to completed some of my school holiday homeworks.. fucking lame shit.

I realize one thing about me. I like to ask people how to do this, how to do that. Its not necessarily stupid or a bad thing to do, as we all shouldn't be afraid to ask things that we do not know. Anyway, the thing is, I should instead just try to find information through the web if possible, or just experiment and try out the things I wanna do first, and then ask questions if you are really stucked or something. Also the reason why I feel guilty is that I'm not a newcomer anymore, it just looks stupid to keep asking such questions rather then finding out for myself. 360 precisions, handstands, all those stuffs. Its funny. Whats more, if I were to ask so much question, I should also help people more, which is something I'm not sure whether I'm actually doing. Oh well.. just something that I wanna rant out.

My video, gotten some clips already, almost gonna finish it, just needa get more runs at Tampines and Buangkok, again more timelapse and more artistic angles and stylistic camera movements, more innovative ideas for my videos, and all this shit. Mainly more runs actually, because I already had good amount of one movement clips.

I'm now trying my best to save up as much money as I could but sadly I can't, everytime I spend money eating food outside, also I still have to go to weights gym which will cost 2.50 every time I go in. At times I even had to waste other people's money. Oh well have to stop eating outside that often already. I still have to save up for fisheye lens and travel trips.

As I got nothing else on top of my head right now, I'll end it here, maybe update this post again later.

Thoughts in process.

Jelapang jam was awesome, managed to capture some cool clips from it and made it into one video.. editing was shit, but I guess for such videos it is the movements and vibe that counts. Christmas jam.. I'm gonna be making another video I guess, judging from how it is going to feel, and then another video for the NYE jam.

This post's gonna be long.
I got a few topics to discuss about and hope its not gonna be boring.

First up, training as usual.
I felt that I need more strength in my lower back to cover up for bad landings and of course for strength in my jumps. I think I'll do more lowerback strengthening exercises in the gym especially deadlifts. Sometimes I feel that my landings are crap.. and I keep thinking of possible back pains in the future. I guess need to work on my landings as well.. back to basics. Squat form is weird though, but I guess its fine. I need to get used to all the lifts before I start my routine in January. Should start planning for it soon too.
Flips. I just realize everything new thats a very long time to learn, once you get them well, like at least get technique down, it will be really easier. Backflips are way harder then it sounds. Whats more, theres still another problem - inconsistency. Oh well, I just really need to repeat and repeat my moves. Frontflip is something I could nail since last year, and because of lack of practice, I still can't even get them nailed properly. I really need to start drilling flips, as they are my weakest. 360s, handstands, bar tricks and the like, all takes alot of practice to be done, and even more to be done well. Need to practice alot now. Its just really frustrating to feel your backflips sucks and all.. this is something that is wrong with me. Once frustration takes over you, things will get more and more out of hand. Also for flips, I feel when you are a beginner, if you don't have access to gym, flips will be damn impactful. You know like landing frontflip in a very crouched position, and sometimes bailing your moves.. it just sucks. Without gym, you can't do the moves that you are afraid of, as in, will take a very long time to get over the fear. I have been pushing myself abit for the lache gainer, but then I still can't make myself do it because of the fear. Gosh, its gonna take awhile to get flips and its motion into my system.
Movements. I think my wallpass have been improving. Its still not very consistent as I want it to be, but at least my technique is getting better and better. I'm actually quite happy with it now despite it being one of my weakest of all the other techniques. Whats more my sdcs are improving alot too, which is something good but it just shows that I place too much priority on this movement alone, and thats why it is my strongest (and also my favourite) movement. 180s (cat2pre) are amazingly good too despite not training it much. Bishan is a good spots to train them. I feel that armjumps, one of my weak points is that I do not dare to do a catleap that I might jerk my shoulders. I'm pretty sure I can do them but I hesistate to grab the top for fear that I can't control it. Especially for high ones that I can't reach. All the rest are fine, precisions are still the same though.

Filming alot more now, gotten quite some amount of clips and gonna start editing my sampler already. As much as possible I want to make it have this element of suprise. In terms of editing, filming, and movements. Hahaha, now I need to find some time by myself to film my movements. I'm not very sure when I'm gonna release it, but I guess I'll just take my time. I hope it will be good. Ashton's showreel seems to be postponed, Fred sampler should be finishing soon, with the clips I have on my comp now. I need to film more timelapses, and more stylistic angle and cameramovement.
I just realize, I keep making myself seem like a very good cameraman but in fact I'm just pretty much an substandard videographer. Editing wise maybe I'm quite good at it, but then its just a standard that one can get to in like a few weeks messing with Vegas. Its pretty much no biggie. Also the most important thing that is for a video is the filming part. Bad filming can't be saved with good editing, but good filming can save bad editing. Whats more now I'm holding a HD camera, but I'm not making any good use with it. My hands are still kinda shaky and all, I can't do shit with adobe after effects, I'm just making myself look big holding a HD camcorder and a tripod, and all my seemingly cool video effects. Oh well, at least my passion in filmmaking is still there. Just I have much more to learn. I need to practice them by helping others make videos haha, and editing them too.

By the way, my shoes are dying soon as I've checked my soles. I think I bought them about end of last year, so its only this durable.. Hopefully this can last till March at least, then I will find a different shoe. This shoe rocks though, really like it alot. I guess the reason why my shoes wears this much is because of training at Bishan. Wtf, if people train over there regularly, I think they need to change shoes every 2 months. I listen to my shoes grinding against those unforgiving rough surfaces in my videos, can imagine how much soles I've lost in just one catleap. Imagine I buy a new shoe and do 1000 sdc2cats there, the shoe is only as good for one day. Seriously, Bishan rocks for sure but, wow the surfaces, although grippy, is a shoe killer.

I'm saving up money for a few stuffs now, but mainly a semi-fisheye lens, and travel trips to England, and one day Lisses too. I just want to ask myself why do I wanna travel? Travelling is definitely fun for anyone, but why England and/or Lisses? I've been watching the pk scene in the UK and just really wish to visit those guys over there, and also the brilliant spots at Cambridge and London. Like what I heard Ashton said, England is to go for enjoyment, Lisses for enlightenment. I do wish to meet Daniel Ilabaca, Blane, PhilyDee and those other guys. If I could meet the really experienced traceurs namely Yamakasi, David Belle, those pioneers in this discipline, it would sure be some inspiration. Lisses, the legendary spots of the world, the birthplace of the thing that I'm doing. Yeah, I really wish to go to those places. It will be hella fun.

No matter how many times I tell myself that I shouldn't like anyone affect the way I am and the things I do, usually I can't make myself do that, I always felt irritated and feel like fighting back. I know its really stupid for such things to happen, but it will take abit of time to get rid of such thoughts. LBC are a great example. IF they are at castle and I'm training there, I would probably hate the sight of them. I don't know why but what for.. I mean if they were to copy me or what and die or something, its nothing that has to do with me, its them who did the move.. I think I'll like to care less about them and mind my own stuffs. Even if they are around I will just do my thing, I don't really wish to talk to them and all.. just ignore as much as possible. Hais, whatever man, I just fucking can't let those people ruin my day or disrupt my training. Its stupid. Also if people wanna copy the things I do, I won't feel bad or think badly about it... I guess like its just a goal to someone, maybe I'm the trendsetter or something, or the guy with the most creativity and stuffs like that. If I'm the one who first did something doesn't mean I should be so proud and call everyone a copycat when they copy me. Lets just stop all this crap.

Just thought that, my friends.. do I have a real true friend? I can say the reason why I don't really click with the friends in school that well is because I don't like to do the stuffs they do, normally slacking around and shit like this. Like many would agree, people with similar interest will click really well and thats why traceurs do have a really special bonds towards each other. The people I talk to in msn is mostly traceurs, and really rare when a schoolmate of mine talk to me, or I talk to them. But then, one can hardly live alone, I'm not saying to be dependent on someone to live, but to be able to have help when we need it. Also at times where I need to pour out my thoughts and troubles, who will be there to really listen and really help. Ahh, well. I don't know much, I just feel that I'm not that sociable and too much obsessed with training. I wonder whether its a good thing or not.
BUT. Pahcore does really change one person. You know many people like to try different things that appeals to them. I was once a guy who really like soccer, and then for awhile I was into gaming, but then now I tried Pahcour with my poser friends in the past, and this is what I've became to. Actually to be honest, many guys started would be really interested and always wanting to train, thats normal. But sooner or later, they might start to get bored of it and slowly lose interest and drift away OR get more serious it in. I won't say 2 years will be enough to see one guy being serious in Parkaour. I'm talking about 3 years of hardwork and proper training. Its only then it becomes and natural habit to go out and train everyday, and only feel weird if you are not training.
Anyway thats way off topic. Changing ones life doing Pahcor, it really does. Of course Pacor does not appeal to everyone. Only a selected few. Its just change everything, the view on things, the way it affects your life, and your friends.. diet, family, all kinds. Its really a turning point in life, towards to right direction. Do you know something, my grades actually did improve while still training hard, I was training throughout my exams and I ended up 11/195 level position. Not bragging at all but just saying it did somehow made me more discipline even my studies, and just saying you shouldn't give excuses not to train because of schoolwork/exams/shit, and lastly on the contrary, if you train alot, doesn't mean your results will slacken.

Oh well the recent case of PKSG being on stomp and those shit, made me thought of how irritating Singaporeans are. I don't really like the stares from the public especially when its like carried with negative connotations. I really hate those aunties and malay mats.. Oh well, when you are living in a such crappy country, rushing progression in architecture and urbanization when its only 43 yearold+/- .. nevermind, talk about Singapore only angers me.

I wanna find more different kinds of music now, I got ideas for videos (my videos) that I wanna make in the future. Documentary-themed video which I plan to be about 8minutes long, I will be talking about my life and Parkour, telling everybody how I feel and things like that. And another, probably a short epic trailer kind of video, artistic and epic feel to it. To make such videos, I must have good music woohoo.
I used to watch snowboard flicks and try to learn their camera movement. I'm still waiting to download Double Decade and Teenage Love Graffiti from two of my favourite production teams, MDP and Isen7. Because snowboarding is quite similar to film for Peekay, its kinda cool that I could try to learn the way the move their camera for shots. Its easier said than done though.. I just can't wait to see their new movies.

To think about it after some soul-searching, I realize as a person I don't really think I've been a good one, I feel that I'm sometimes pretty irritating and things. I don't really thing I cherish my friends properly, thinking that I'm taking things for granted. Sometimes I couldn't take insults, sometimes I give too much insults. I might always tend or seem to be a little boastful probably subconciously. Then I do contradict myself at times, kinda like hate people because they do things that I actually do as well.. and many more.
Year's almost over and I hope to have a brighter year ahead, especially when this year is OLEVEL YEAR NOOOO!!

I'm gonna write a year in review soon.
This post is filled with crap. Wasting time reading much?

At the moment.

Super bored right now, almost half of december already flew past.
Fuck I hate school lah seriously, Sec 4, Olevel's burdening me. FUCK, I got no mood to go to school. But I will still train, more on my strength that is.

Ok, I've been training almost everyday and hardly gave my body rest. I think its kinda strenous to my body if I train everyday, and always do high impact stuffs all that.. I should do light movements on alternate days or something like that. Anyway, I don't wanna talk all those stuffs, even I read also bored to death.

Strength training this week was to train for strength, for abit, and today I still could squat 70kg x5, which is not bad considering I didn't use much effort or hype myself up much. 19kg pullups failed one rep, which is ok, because actually its very near my max, 21kg. Benchpress amazingly is quite damn good. This following week will be practicing on form, doing front squats, deadlifts, standing presses, to get used to them as I wanna be able to perform a wide range of lifts. Power cleans are really hard to learn but hopefully I can get them down too. I wanna practice my squats andbe able to do 60kg squats properly and without much struggle. Probably another 5 or 6 more weeks of adaptation in to strength training then I will start on my new routine, about the last week of January next year. I would only do movements once every week (on saturday most probably).

Just now trained movements abit too at the night with Glen, practiced my runs, my climbs, anyway I think I'm getting used to my straight armed climbup already. I bailed at the end just now, slipping off a rail precision, my foot failing to make proper contact. Sucks man. I hate bailing, it makes you feel totally fucked up. Even after a good session, if you bailed, it will ruin your whole mood. I got so many cuts and bruises on my shin thanks to the countless amount of times I've bailed. Needa focus more on my movements to reduce bails from now on. Sucks man, its just kind of like a natural thing to happen if you practice pahcore. You WILL bail at times, usually lack of focus (carelessness) or pushing yourself too much (the latter being the stupid one).

Rage Froobling. I wanna make a video on that, but then I wouldn't wanna screw them up, like I'm not sure whats REALLY Rage Froobling, is like what the UFF did to Parkour if I were to make a video that have no link to RF. Anyway I still wanna make a video that shows at least in some way similar to Teghead's video. I've been practicing runs and climbs, including a simulation of a human opposition. I decided to make two videos. One is my cinematography/pk reel, which will be release early Jan, and another one just a compilation of clips I've gathered throughout December (clips are not worthy of my showreel). I'm gonna include some Rage Froobling things into both videos maybe.

I'm gonna needa film alot more now, as there are limited time. Need more time lapses, more movements too, and more artistic shots (fancy angles and camera movements). Have troubles trying to find places for silhouette shots. Also, other videos that I may be working on is the PKSG 2008 video, the new years eve jam video (PKSG JAM), Thai's traceur jam video, Fred sampler, Ashton showreel. Next year I'm gonna work on a couple of people's videos too. All I actually wanna do is to really collect many clips. Haha.

I thought of stuffs today. If I really wanna travel to England some day, I must start earning and saving up money for the plane tickets and the trip. I'm trying to save up to 3k, start working after the end of my Olevels, and hopefully by mid-2010 I've saved up the 3k that I need to travel. I hope to have someone to accompany me too, and I would probably be staying there for a week. Also I want to make a steadicam for my camera soon, I just don't know where to find the parts and tools to make it, I don't know any DIY/Hardware store. I also wanna save up for a fisheye lens. Everything else won't be much. Now I should really start saving up.

Training this week might be good but then I feel that theres much improvement that I need to put in so I won't always go back with that regretted mind. All I can say trainings this month were better then the older days but then I still want to stop doing stupid things and stuffs. Its amazing many things I say, can't be put into proper actions. My goals for 2008 for my way of training doubtfully have been achieved. Theres only about 16 days left in 2008, so I wonder whether in this 2 weeks+ I can be happy with the things I do.

Tomorrow will be having a Jelapang Jam, and then I would like to make a Christmas jam, then new years eve Jam. Loads of jam lined up, means fun and more filming coming my way.

WOOHOO!

One day goals.

Felt that I'm more and more serious in my trainings than ever right now.

I'm starting see the effect from my strength training into my movements now. Jumping power increased and I've done more and more bigger jumps right now. My wallpass technique is getting better although its not very consistent yet. My SDC seem to more relax now but when it comes to far distances (that I can cover), my landing is poorly controlled. I need to practice more in control in my SDCs. Precision are good, which I'm quite happy. Armjumps, height wise are getting amazing, kinda like a testament in my transition of strength from my strength training routine, but I wanna learn how to land control for far armjumps. I need some work on balancing and rail precisions at the moment. Other movements are still OK..

Flips still sucks pretty much. I wanna be able to land nice flips, good height, landing not in bent knees or such, good control in landing, etc. It seems like my tucking, timing and transferring of forward momentum to height, and also understanding of the physics of flips (in my body) is the reason why my reason in sloppy. Bar tricks still really need adaptation, I'm still very scared of my 'leg swing thing' and the other movements are inconsistent too.

Strength training, I think my squats are OK, nothing bad about the form, I think I'm just overanxious at times. I'm gonna start trying to regain strength for abit, for this week, and from the other weeks onwards is just perfecting technique and form and rotating exercises. Adapting to new lifts and brushing up on stuffs that I need work in.

I still find them I push myself too much in trainings, although this week is a far better week. I bailed quite alot of times this week though.. some really careless, some just stupid. I think I'm pushing myself too much. I think one of the reason why this is so is that I thought I felt progression, and I think I am now able to do this or that. Well I should really stop trying to aim to nail harder movements or what, but rather just drill on the stuffs that I could already do and make it consistent. Since I already got the 'power' in this case, I should get it controlled. There is no point that you nail a bigger movement and hurt your joints and shit. Need to focus more on control and fast movements, and I want to get include more runs in to my training now.

I'm still thinking, it feels funny that we are actually do what we are doing. I mean, why would want to try to do a run up followed by a jump, in such placing your hand on a wall and tucking your legs through your arms, getting you up and over the wall and gaining enough momemtum to bring you to another ledge, landing it in a controlled manner. Or just another other thing that is considered 'Parkour' to people. I find it weird that we actually don't understand alot of things we do, that includes life. Humans just either hunt for food for the instincts, satisfying their want for fun by, having fun. I mean, everything we do now, is just what we want to do, we don't have a specific reason for everything. Ok I'm not making much sense, don't know whether its understandable at all.

Right now I think Pahcore, or more accurately movements, is like a really big part of me. I can tell you that I think I'm closer to my friends I train with as compared to my classmates or other friends. I don't know why, but then traceurs or people who practice such stuffs shares a bigger bond than most other people. Everyday now I'm training, training and training. I hardly even go out with my classmates or old friends anymore, even after school I go home straight and is kinda like, training-obsessed. I think we all should know how to draw a line whether you are training so much that you start to neglect your good friends, and your seriousness in your discipline. Oh well, its not really much a matter as I don't actually have much 'real' friends from school or anywhere else (other then through PeeKay). I need to socialize more.

Anyway, theres a reason why the post is titled such. Yes, one day goals. I will be able to do this stuffs one day. Most of this goals are purposely written in a way no one can properly understand, but only to me. I'm just writing this down and see whether they are actually being done and filmed in my 2010 video (doesn't matter whether I do them anot by then, but at least I will nail them one day).
-Slide castle catleap
-Top castle precision
-Kash2cat
-DDL Precision
-Dgainer
-FCL
-GCL
-Nazir wall
-Treegarden level sdc2p.
-Reverse2cat Bishan
-SDC2P NCspot 2nd ledge
(I will update this list when I need to, this list is not exhaustive)

This movements are probably the outcome of hard training, only numerous training and hard work put in can result to the strength and control needed for those intricate movements. That's what the whole purpose of myself training. I want to tell myself that I've only come so far due to the very reason that I've put so much effort in improving myself. That is why next year I'm gonna spend alot of time strength training in the gym, and also for getting flips and everything else down into my system.

Whats more, next year is the year where I hope to get my OAC and 2x BW squats. I'm gonna seriously work on my strength! And Olevels will be over next year, so 2010 will be SHIOK!

Out of hand.

Recent training, as for the whole of this week, is kinda bad.

I'll really type my shit down fast.
Monday is crap, as I've said in the previous post. Alot of impactful stuffs, training for way too long, sprained my ankle after one huge running jump precision, and worsened after a bail off a catleap. Gotten my flips back though... but still alot of improvements are to be made.
Tuesday I rest due to my crappy ankle, went to gym. Forms suddenly feel really crap out of the sudden, will explain more later.
Wednesday rest, did shits at home..
Thursday went to gym did a few stuffs.. ok was not that bad, then night time when to Simei and train, for like damn long.. which is totally not going the way I planned. Wallpasses seems to be OK and really shitty at times... in other words fucking inconsistent, but yeah I've seen improvements. Remember the stupid wall which I call "wall of doom", the wall where I did nearly 50 attempts just to get a wallpass on film, which failed and in turn screwed my knee really badly. Don't know, I'm not totally good with it yet, but last week I managed to nailed the wall in my first attempt. Today I nailed it 6 times in i think 13 attempts... Which is not bad considering the past.. but I didn't really want to continue once I fail, bad memories. I did alot of movements and really stresses my knees, which is the bad of doing too mcuh on one day.
Didn't stop there though. Friday went to Wes' jam, did some stuffs here and there, wasn't planning to train much but then again, I succumbed to temptation. Actually it was ok until I went to Clarke Quay, and think I overdid myself.. And I had another look at the SDC2Pre, NOT EASY AT ALL, Just tells me how crazy the standards are in UK, the ramp at Imax, sdc2p like NOTHING! Fuck, I was another video, go to the youtube account 'littlemrenergy' and watch his latest video 'sheffield', INSANE OWNAGE to the standard here in Singapore. OK went abit off topic. I re-tried the SDC2cat, isn't easy too, I got it usually by luck. So much more to improve on...
And then yesterday, went to gym, my form on squats felt really bad, smae for my bench press all of the sudden.. it feels damn weird sia. I'm not talking about fatigue, just form without weights feels crap. DAMN IT LAH.... I really need to work on it. I don't know why I feel insecure with my forms alot of times.. and need someone reliable to spot it. Its sooooooo weird. fuck lah. irritating feeling. I wasn't planning to do any movements training that day, but decided not to slack at home, but meet up the other guys to slack or maybe do light movements. As usual, succumbed to temptation, ended up training so many stuffs.. to a point where there is too much impacts going into the knees, ankle, lowerback. DIE.

This week is crap, today I'm staying at home. I'm gonna train handstands, somethign that I haven't properly focused for a long time. DAMN! and I said I'm gonna get them by this year. Fuck, I'm not working towards my goals. Seriously man, actually, don't even talk about goals, but about being strict towards my training (AND GOALS). I said 1hr 30minutes the max for movements training. But didn't stick to it. That is just one thing bad about me.. I never stick to my plans.. I mean sometimes I do, but occasionally things will cock up. I really hope my knees, ankles, lowerback, actually essentially my whole body is still fine when I hit 40. Thats why I need to make sure my squats form and the others are spot on, and also my movements training isnt too stressful for my joints. Those are some stuffs that I must seriously work on... since last time sia.. damn.

I got to admit, my knees are totally 100% fine yet, all the way back to early July. Ankle sprain also isn't totally healed. At times after training, I feel some lowerback strain. Wrist feels pains time and again, but they aren't really serious. The bruise on my hip (that I've gotten from Monday) still feels pain. All this stuffs isn't like all the time, the knee being usually after a impactful day of training, ankle from the bail, lowerback after heavy or too squatting and/or deadlifting, wrist after long day of handbalancing. Thats why its never good to train for too long.

Also find that I see improvement when I'm able to do a bigger, better movement. I think even if I'm strong to be able to handle impact, if I keep pushing my limits, keep doing bigger and bigger jumps, in the end I'm still handling same amount of impact, which really isn't of any point. Improvement doesn't always mean being able to nail a bigger jump or what, but being able to control a movement properly, feeling that a movement that you once struggled to do felt easier, being faster, smoother in your movement, or just feeling lighter in your movement. Sure it is ok to try some big movement, I mean it is a way to test your improvement - to be able to nail one 'big' stuff that you couldn't in the past. But you can't keep on pushing.. not only is that risky, but your joints wouldn't be happy too. Sometimes when you improve, your mind definitely will feel happy, but then your body won't feel good, which is just.. a bad trade in my opinion. I should really start changing my training mindset.

What else to say about this week? My diet, is crap. Eating too much fast food, like twice for this week alone. I guess I should really cut out the bad fats and eat properly, especially protein. EGGS ROCKS. TUNA TOO, CHICKEN STILL THE BEST.

Ok. Let me talk about some stuffs first.
Flips are getting there.. but I think I need more practice in my backflip.. on getting more height and proper tucking and being able to do them on concrete. Frontflip still the same probelm.. can't find the correct timing to untuck to land it straight and well without overrotating or underrotating. Aerial still needs work on flat. I wanna try the lache gainer and sideflip soon.. but one step at a time.
Pahcour-wise. Wallpasses found improvements. SDC is good, but not good enough for the one at Clarke Quay, but no hurry for that. Need to work on my fluidity rather then on bigger precision jumps or catleap or whatever. Muscleups seems alot better and natural now, being able to do false grip muscleup on shelter. Cat2cats are way better. Dash 2 precisions are getting further. Precisions seems better, but I never work on them recently. Have some ideas in castle, gonna nail some stuffs no one ever thought of doing... one day (not anytime soon). Still wants improvement in vertical jump. Guess thats all.
Random stuffs-wise, bar tricks are getting a little better, but still not the state I want them to be. Need to nail more new tricks.. get comfortable with the old ones, and get good with them. Handstands are getting better.. although I haven't train them much. Control is almost there, but still, its very inconsistent. I wonder when will I be able to say that I can do a handstand. Still, I will work hard for it. Rail-work, I'm getting ok with the KASH-turnvault thing, but still wanna get it till I can sit on the bar 98% of the time. Backwards SDC... I NEED HIPS FLEXIBILITY DAMN. I want to be able to tuck my legs through my hands in a l-sit to handstand. Palmspins are getting there, but haven't tried it on a rail, too scared to do so. FUCK. Still training for dash to turnvault like what Victor Lopez did. 360 precisions... still super uncontrolled. Reverse vaults for distance.. very hard.

Also I wanna say that, I see Pahcore way differently then most of you guys. I've been influenced by some guys in Parkour.net in the past, and my thinking differs quite alot of other guys. I tell myself I don't do pahcore because I clearly don't. I don't try to make my movement practical so I can apply them in real life, because I don't train for that (but I'm pretty sure if there are situation where I need to put my skills to test, I can). Sometimes efficiency can be fun (rage froobling wootwoot), but I don't want to be just efficient and efficient only.
And I'm not the guy who likes doing quadrupedalling, multiple precision jumps, doing conditioning the way Yamakasi does it (no disrespect to them), because I'm kinda the pro-weight training guy as I'm very convinced that weights are the better way to train for strength. So many myths and other craps goes about though, something that I feel kinda sad for. Actually I don't really mind as its cool doing training differently from others. SQUATS ARE THE BEST EXERCISE EVER!

I really should start taking videos right now. Missed out a couple of good scenery shots.. only to know that I didn't bring my camera along.. hope I have another chance to catch them again. Whats more, its already December tomorrow. Thats fucking fast. Holidays are soon to be over... Have to cherish time right now and train hard. Oh and Ashton, don't forget about your video. Gonna start collecting clips in my travels right now.

Tomorrow I'm going to gym and start working on my form.
Tuesday I'm going Chong Pang probably to train for the SDC2P at Clarke Quay. And check out spots at Sembawang.
Wednesday I think I'm going to Taman Jurong, film stuffs there, calling guys to come along as well.. somewhat like a mini jam for all of us.
Thursday will be my final deloading day, after that I'm free to do my own training in the gym.
Friday I'll probably go castle and work on stuffs again.. especially flips I guess.
Saturday, again at Tampines, jam over there
Sunday.... I don't know.
Plans for the next week - keep training around 1hr 30minutes. And film!

Now that it is December, I hope that my training will improve.

Things for now.

Sorry I had to change the blog link again, and keep it private. I don't want kids to read my posts and then use it as a source of references (in other words, copying). Anyway I guess I'll just private this and invite those people who I want to read.. even better.

Don't you find it scary if guys going to extremes and having all the songs you use in your videos as ringtones or in a playlist in your psp? And guys even memorising your videos, whenever you go to a spot you will say "So and so, did this and that" for everything. The consequences of being high profile. Don't know why man, this is so sad. Everything can be easily ignored, thats ok (easier said then done though), but sometimes things gets too irritating. Also, if you were to ignore others, you will feel guilty somehow, like imagine if you ask the other experienced traceurs for tips and yet they don't reply you and all, or just imagine if you weren't accepted by the people around you right now. Damn..

Anyway, enough of those craps, lets see...
On monday, was a good and bad day.. firstly I bailed alot of times, including have a bruised hip and sprained ankle now. Fell of a tictac crane, landing on my hip sliding down stairs.. did a running precision only to sprained my ankle upon landing, chipped my knee against a sdc (high obstacle), falling backwards off a catleap (just attempting to do a high catleap), missed the edge, landed carelessly with my ankle twisted, bailed a reverse to precision only to scratch my arm, received quite alot of impacts, etc. All those although is quite minor, its still frustrating to have, and the sprained ankle is still here, and one of the reason why I didn't went out to train today (another being rain), but still gonna practice some stuffs later when things are dryer.
Only thing really good was that I nailed the crane and also got back my flips at castle.

Strength training went on even with the sprained ankle. I just can't take impacts, but still can walk and squat normally. I realize something.. my squats are good at times, and bad at times (as in form). I'm not sure whether its 'perfect' form, but usually it feels weird, and when it feels weird, it is wrong. Usually it is because of tight muscles and wrong foot positioning. Have to get used to it soon. And I've been practicing forms of new lifts, frontsquats and goodmornings, trying to get powercleans, etc. Want to 'perfect' benchpress and deadlifts.

Gotta really work on handstands at home right now, and practice on my 360s. Theres alot of things that needs brushing up and work on right now. Currently my sdcs are like way much better then my other movements so I really shouldn't put too much emphasis on them. Running precisions or jumps in general will be better by strength training alone, oh and just abit of plyometrics for power which I will be doing. I'm gonna drill my flips, especially backflips and fronts, till its second nature (or at least as near to 2nd nature as possible). I could already those and wallspins, aerials, and done lache gainers. I want to get wallflips, gainers and sideflips down too. Roundoff, bhs, such combos, maybe. Maybe just at least get them down. Bar tricks, not quite there yet. My reverse vaults for distances too, its so uncontrolled..

I think I'm gonna start filming very soon, at least starting with artistic shots and timelapses. I feel like getting as much clips as possible, just to keep them in my computer or what, and also work on the PKSG 2008 video. Damn, still regretted not making the bishan jam video, only if we had a person filming for us that day, so much better and easier it will be. Lost of mood suddenly.. as I wanted to nail some stuff. Forget it anyway... and yeah, Ashton showreel, "when?" is the question.

Don't have much to write about actually.. so bye.

Gainer to catleap, dash gainer, frontflip to catleap.

Thoughts crawling in my mind.

Was a really long time that I last updated myself of the reason I change.

I'd like to re-read what I've posted in the past and see how much my thoughts change and the progress I'm making in my mind. I've decided to keep this opened for viewers, but still I wish to keep it underground. If one guy manage to find their way here, good then, but I don't really care.
I've thought to myself time and again, and still wonder why do I train so hard for? What drives me to go out and train? What am I training for? What do I want to be, or what do I want to do? What am I trying to achieve with all this?
Usually all this answers won't come directly to you, sometimes it will just pop by in your mind out of a sudden. It is because such questions are unique to everyone, and when people don't bother to answer those questions with honesty, or fail to give an acceptable answer to himself, its just really sad. Do we really train, so that one day we can finally put them into good use? Or really is it because we wanna be stronger, healthier, fitter, active, whatever? All these cliched examples that I've heard more then enough. Does anybody really just think about what they are even pushing themselves for? Or are they just not that serious at all, just train for the sake of training? As the saying goes yet again, Seb Foucan said "Without philosophy, action has no meaning." If you are heading in no definition direction with what you are doing now, chances are you won't stick this for long.
I don't really like it when people just give answers, that are like so stereotyped, reasons that are already heard so many times. They probably just copy and pasted from what someone have said, from some website, or something. Whether they are honest in their reasons or not is up to them, its not like I or anyone else can do anything to help it.

Again like I said earlier, such thoughts won't come directly into your face, but then again we all can really really think about what we are doing, and try to come out with an answer. Also the reasons will always change or develop, that is because as the time pass and you get more deeper into the philosophy of the discipline, your mind will have new, different thoughts as of why you are training again.

But for now, I'll just state my honest opinions to those questions that I've wrote above.
I think it is really that I have a deep passion to move, I just love movements, they are just so fun. To not be restricted by anything, is just freedom to me. To overcome any obstacles, including my mental barriers, and to do anything that I want, to be able to do movements that I've never thought of doing before, is truly freedom to me. Moving gracefully through the environment is just a wonderful thing. To achieve full body control and to continually break the frontiers of my limits is just amazing. Controlling my every movement, to move the way I want to, are just stuff anyone would dream for. Its only a sad fact that they don't have the heart to work hard for what they want. Through this discipline, its amazing how far I came from, how much blood, sweat and tears I've put in, and how much improvements and learnings I've experienced. I now definitely move to live, and live to move. To constantly improve myself is my neverending goal - to achieve it is purely optional, but to work hard for it and having fun in my quest to 'perfection' is mandatory.

It is in fact quite amazing to look back at myself before I even started training, how weak and unfortunate I am, living the life of a sloth alike my typical human companions. Now, I'm always a man in a mission, trying to make full use of time to develop myself into a stronger, faster, more proficient individual who understand the mechanics of his body. I admit that in training and outside training I'm a totally different person altogether, but nevertheless my desires are always there. I want look back at my youth when I'm much older, and feel proud that I have lived my childhood and my teenage life to the fullest. But I won't stop there, I wish to be one that could travel around the world one day, seeing the world outside of ugly, stupid and boring Singapore, touching the very soil of the birthplace of the discipline, touching the very walls of the most famous spots in the world. Without that piece of puzzle in my life's jigsaw, I won't feel completeness. I hope to transform all my dreams to reality, and to do that, the only way is to work hard.

I've not anywhere near achieving my goals of life, but I'll start as soon as now. The mountain is already ahead of me, only when I reach the peak will I feel fulfillment. My life revolves around alot things. Movements, filmmaking, friends, having fun are the main things. Will 2010 be the breakthrough year? Can I be an professional filmmaker one day? Will I be able to go down in history someday? Will I have the chance of travelling around the country doing what I love most? And when I'm old, can I tell myself that I've lived an successful, meaningful life?

It is undoubtedly hard to achieve them. Some of them might some absurd but this is how things goes. Dream big, they say. There are countless of movements I will train hard for and I'm going to risk my life. One day, I will attempt moves one shouldn't even think of it being possible. No matter how hard or how impossible it seems, it is nonetheless still attainable. Things ain't gonna be the same anymore. The words I say now no matter how dramatic or cool it sounds won't mean anything if I don't put them into action.

- And do you guys realize I hardly use the word pahcore when I talk to others, write things down, or describe what I'm doing? Because if you weren't still updated with my current situations, I don't practice pahcore, never once did. David Belle expressed pahcore as efficient movement, going from one point to another in the fastest time possible, doing movement that you will do in escape or chase situation. I wonder if anyone really think what they are doing is, pahcore. Just look at everyone, aiming to sdc as far as possible, wallpass higher, doing all single movements. Is that really pahcore? And also running is definitely the most used movement in an escape, do I see anyone really train that element? Almost everything you guys trained for is just pointless in an escape? When you are running full speed to a rail, you ain't gonna do an sdc, just jump on to it or over it, when you are doing a wallpass, chances are people can still grab your leg if you cant get up fast enough. If you have watched Teghead's Rage Froobling video, that is definitely pahcore, but everyone is bashing it all up, so whats the point, might as well make up a new name to the thing he is training. I can go on and on but I bet you guys already understand what I'm trying to get through.
Why do I don't practice pahcore then? It is because efficiency just does not appeals to me. I just wanna move the way I want to, without rules or restriction. To move with grace, as I said earlier. I don't like going in just a straight line direction, I'd like to add abit of flair into it. I'll just call it movements in general. I spelt pahcore this way because it will avoid it from appearing in searches. hehehehehe.

Just realize I written a whole bulk. Sometimes my thoughts just drift too far away from topic.
OK, lets talk about recent training. On monday I went to Bishan to train. Managed to nail some stuffs, like the 2nd storey catleap and dash to cat. But I felt that in some occasions I impacted myself too much like forcing myself to do a precision but fall back down quite badly. SDC2P as well. Really bad. My soles of my shoes are gonna wear out so soon, thanks the Bishan unforgiving rough surfaces.
The next day is my first day of deloading, they were done really fast and were really easy. I think I'm gonna make use of the time in the gym to practice form in some lifts. On gym days I think at the night I will go castle, which is what I did that day (yesterday). I drill my wallpass severely and I felt that it is getting way better. Did runs and did wallpass in different directions, after different movements, in lesser running space. Was a really good training that day. Armjumps were getting good but I lost one movement but nothing really much. After that I went to Simei and train the irritating wall (which killed my knees). Did 2 attempts, was quite close but I'm gonna stop right there. AMAZINGLY I feel a tinge of pain in my knee in both landings, I think that wall is CURSED. I HATE THAT WALL OMG!!!
Today I went to dino and shino. It is my SDC drilling day, was ok at dino, but and shino I think I really messed up my muscle memory due to the number of poor landings and badly executed SDCs. Also felt really tired and bailed twice, hitting the same spot on the same shin FUCK. I hate it when my shin gets hurt! I think I did too much, trained over the 1hr 30minutes limit, and did too much of them. The next time I go there I'm gonna make sure I land each move nicely.

Tomorrow I'm gonna rest, or just mess around with the bars and do some rail work. Can't waste my time anymore.
Friday gonna hit the gym, after that I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Saturday is the Bishan Jam, won't do much for obvious reason, but I feel like trying some stuffs, and the wallpass. Drilling precisions as well.
Sunday is my 3rd deloading day, after that I should be drilling my wallpasses again at castle.
Monday maybe going to Sengkang, train on running precision at Dame du lac, practicing basics at NC hotspot, and maybe do some high elements stuff at SK Park.
Tuesday is another day in the gym, night time probably do some bar tricks again.
Wednesday heading to the beach woohooo, must seriously start flipping already, can't waste anymore time.
Thursday another day in the gym.
Friday... friday then talk lah.

Last thing, videos. I think I am going to start filming soon, maybe the last week of November I'll start filming clips. When I go far places such as Clementi, Taman Jurong, Jelapang, or some places where I'm pretty sure I'll go just once, I'll probably bring my camera along so I can film. I'll need to get a variety of artistic shots, think of a semi-storyline, and stuffs like that.. too hard to put into words. And then there is still Ashton's video. Timelapses as well, silhouettes shots. For now I wanna train properly, seriously and progress incrementally, and make sure I don't do stupid things or really bad stressful stuffs like back in the past.

Bye noobs.

End of 5x5

I just came back from the last day of my routine, felt really damn good. Actually I took this day like really, really preparing for like a competition kind of thing, but not really to the extent. But I did way more psyching up and proper stuffs to get you ready for your maximum lifts, and it sure did pull off well. Ok, squats was awesome, it was definitely my max of lifts, really used alot of effort into that. Was really happy to end up with a new PR, and end this cycle happily. Benchpress sucks, ok, I did manage to pull like 2 reps of 50kg, but then the 3rd rep slipped up, but I don't really care because I don't like benchpresses much. Pullups are awesome again, which is the really 2nd favourite lift in this routine, or rather, the 2nd most important lift for me.

Definitely this workout made me way more stronger and powerful, which improved my squats by 6kg for 5 reps, learnt way more about strength training, acclimated to the conditions, jumps gotten higher and further, muscleups are easy as fuck. Also I think my discipline towards this is really good, I only skipped once due to being really tired the day after my birthday jam, a sacriface I'm willing to make. On that day I would really need to push myself so if I'm going down with half of fitness I probably can't perform well. But overall I did still went for the trainings, making sure I stick to it, so I'm really happy. These are things you would need in order to get achievements you want.

Current personal records
Full back Squats of 76KG (5 reps)
Weighted Pullups of 21KG (5 reps)
Bench Press of 48KG (5 reps)
Deadlift of 66KG (5 reps) - honestly I don't really bother doing this much thats why the gap.
Standing Press of 35KG (5 reps) - yeah don't train this either.

Oh yeah when I took out my camera, some guys over there was asking me why do I take videos, in a sarcastic tone. Well the other guys were talking to themselves in malay and said the word "youtube" and they burst out laughing. Its really funny though how they laugh to ourselves, either thinking we're weak, or wanting to showoff, when they are the ones who are weak, and training for big bulky muscle to attract girls. Firstly whats wrong of just taking some clips of my personal achievement? Its not like I wanna post it in the net and show off my squats. Its just stupid. But ah, fuck it, I shouldn't care.

I really doubt this is my maximum, I mean, maybe, just maybe I could go for more but I decided to take a break now, because I've been constantly increasing workload week by week and fatigue is really building up, so I need to take time out as well. Also since now its the holidays, I would probably want to train more so as to keep up with the time. After deloading I'll probably do some proper training for strength so that I don't get rusty when it comes to next year, and of course training movements, which I'm gonna think of what I should focus on training for this period of time.

My goals for next year is to get a 5 reps full back squats of 2x my bodyweight (which would be 100kg ++). I really hope I could, since next year I would really focus alot on my strength. I would also train hard for an OAC, so I hope I could be able to do Planche en Force before the end of this year. I just hope I don't gain too much mass or something in the next year. I really need to finish my puberty soon, in fact it hasn't even reached the halfway point, damn it I do lack growth hormones. I need to grow!
Anyway, of course all this goal is just for next year. But for life, I would really want to be able to squat 3 plates one day, which is 140kg, and being able to pullup with my own bodyweight added.
After reviewing the jumps that I wanted to do, it seems like really, many things aren't that easy as you think. Yeah for sure my legs have increased power, but that doesn't mean I can nail all the big stuffs I used to be unable to. I think I'm too complacent. Just because I've improved, doesn't mean that I can nail the stuffs that I couldn't in the past. Things are way harder then it seems, almost always, but definitely in whatever circumstances, everything is possible.
I guess the thing I want to do in the future and during the holidays, is not all the big jump stuffs. They will be improved with strength training alone. Heres what I think I will be doing. Generally alot of more technical stuffs, meaning its not about strength or power, but rather of confidence and technique. Things like flips, reverse vault for distance, 360 precision/catleap. I'll try precision jumps, but usually to a higher obstacle, its way lighter in terms of impacts, and I want to get used to the "JUMP UP NOT FORWARD, GODDAMMIT!!!!!!!" shit. I want to get used to different kinds of vaults. Train more runs. Out of everything, the most important one is to just keep everything low impact, and drill severely, but try to keep movements training at most 1hr 30minutes, or spreaded out alittle longer, but don't overtrain your body lest you kill your knees and ankles.

Just a conversation with Nazir just now had already changed my thoughts on how I see posers mostly and my thinking in a whole. Well few questions, if theres newcomers, would you train in front of them? How would you feel if they suck up to you? How would you react to newcomers saying 'WOAH' (like Zhiyang) everytime when you do 'big' stuffs? People copying you? Those kind of questions. What he said actually does make sense.
Firstly, whats wrong with training in front of newcomers? My initial thoughts are that, they will want to copy you, and they will irritate you and shit. Now, actually whats the point of letting a bunch of posers, or in fact any people, get into your way of training. Just do what you want to, and there's no need to care about what they say or think about you. About copying, it is true that everyone does copy from each other. Just look at the videos, how many people are doing the same thing, sdc to pre, sdc to pre, all the same. Nazir said was true, those were just goals. Just look at how many people aiming to do the nazir's wall, SDC2P at dinos, all the stuffs. There isn't a rule that say its wrong to copy others, theyre just goals to nail for, to test progression. I was too sensitive, but yeah I still think we should take some time out and think of new ways to move and not be too close minded and copy ALL THE TIME. Yeah and I shouldn't be all worked up if anyone would copy me. No point.

Was also chatting about when kids wants to be like you, and suck up to you and all that. Oh, so just a few words they say will affect your whole training and thoughts? There's no point dreading over it. Just really, heck care. What really matters is yourself, the reason you are training, no one should affect you. You just have to be yourself.

I wonder if you guys actually really thought of what you're doing. Everyone definitely have their own way of training, own reason, own style. Just wondering at all, if you guys take this seriously. Do you guys actually thought of the reason why you train? OH WAIT, I KNOW, self-improvement, so you can use it in an escape, to be more active more stronger, overcome my mental barriers. I'm so bored of such generic reasons of training. I will want to share my thoughts, BUT NAH, you guys will probably copy and paste what I said and say "yeah yeah me too!". You know sometimes the real reason why I chose to be original sometimes and not always blindly copy other is that, you will need as a person yourself to think about your reasoning, your way of training, the direction you're heading. You know, without philosophy, action HAVE NO MEANING. I want to really think the real purpose of my training, and really see why I am doing all this, what do I want to gain. But then again, as long as I know myself, and have a clear conscience, I'm all set.

Ah, I really don't know what to say now.
I guess now as my 10 week routine is totally well done and over, time to start training movement for the remaing 6weeks +/- of the year, to do some unfinished business. I'm gonna start filming soon. Gonna really plan on each training, and deloading, and what I'm gonna do in the gym in december. I don't wanna waste anymore time now, have to take the full advantage of time I have, training at night if I have to.

Yeah fuck I don't feel like talking so much, actions speak louder then words.

BTW go watch my new video on denester1 profile!

Another rant.

Alright, 4 more sessions to go, about 9 days to go. I can't wait to start training proper movement training. School has ended yesterday, so much more time to relax right now and take everything slowly. Right now since I have the time, I must put them into good use. I think its gonna be time to plan my trainings, and my deloading for strength training, and what will I do in the gym during December.

Yesterday I went to train with Dblucy, actually ain't supposed to but since I got time I just wanna kind of de-stress myself. In the end as usual, trained alot more then I should. My knee isn't fully healed thats for sure, thats why I shouldn't do too much. Just yesterday made me realize the gains I had from my routine and how effective squats is. I feel so much progress in my leg power and I can feel that the stuffs I use to be able to do are bloody easy now, and I can jump further right now, including nailing some really cool new stuffs. But then I shouldn't continue pushing the limits, but rather strive to 'perfect' the easier ones. I feel that my precisions really improved in terms of landing it nicely, and I've felt that I jump up more (instead of jumping too much forward) right now, but still think that it could be better. Wallpasses on the other hand are terrible. First is the height that I'm getting, and secondly is how I couldn't connect the grabbing the edge part with the climbup. I wanna work on my climbups particularly after wallpasses and also when my legs are low.

So much improvements in my jumps right now I feel that I can crane that shit soon at Sengkang. I wanna drill my basics or movements that I'm comfortable with now and not continue doing big stuffs. Also incorporate more runs into my training regimen. What I felt yesterday was something kind of like.. enlightenment. It really tells me that you can do anything you want if you really want to. The few stuffs I did there was what I used to tell myself and others that "I will do that one day", or some random stuffs I would think is 'impossible' or 'too hard' in the past, if I even thought of a possibility of doing things. The spot castle holds a some memories. It was the very first spot I train at, and also one of the most frequent spot I train in, until now I find that place one of the best places to ever train at. I haven't really got bored of it. I can tell I know castle pretty damn well, because everytime after school I will past by there and do a few moves, went to train there at night at several occasions, the time with my poser friends, the time with Wesley and friends, castle is still one of the best spot in Singapore. Don't get why people don't like that place. You can train everything over there.

Boreded. My mother as usual continue taking my POCKET MONEY now. Look at the extent she had gone to. I almost couldn't go to gym today but luckily had some spare cash. She is really too much and I made it well bloody clear if she even dare to think of taking my bursary, I'm sure to do something. I really cannot stand it already. Its all my money and none of hers. I seriously don't know what to say already. If you were me you confirm also cannot stand it.

Sometimes people can be so bloody unreasonable. I still remember about months back, when teachers are bloody unreasonable. Firstly, I merely bounced the ball in class and the teacher was fucking not happy, blah and blah then she wanna confiscate it. So be it, she go take herself lah. Then she kept warning me to give her the ball. Fuck if she want the ball take herself sia. And for that she decided to give me the pink form. LAME SIA. Oh, and there was another reason to it. I was doing the science homework, in her chinese (OH FUCK I HATE CHINESE) lesson because I have nothing else to do. I've already copied whatever shit that will not affect my results in my chinese exam at all. So I wanted to do my own homework which I need to passup on that day. She go confiscate it. You tell me whether it is correct or not. All this is on the same day, so I got really pissed, so I just bloody took back the homework from the table right after the lesson. She demanded me to return her but I just can't be bothered. The next few days (NOTE, ABOUT A WEEK LATER) she gave me the pink form. Bloody unreasonable sia. She say bouncing the ball affected my classmates. LOL, its not even making much noise, she is just too sensitive. Secondly she said when I copied my work finished, I can still read through my notes.. LIKE I EVEN CARE. SAD SIA. But of course given her attitude and obesity, and biasness and being so bloody unreasonable, I just bloody hell sign the pink form to make her happy, although she fail in life.

People like this are so darn bloody unreasonable, sad sia to have this people even passing through your life. Oh I forget to mention, right after that, I pretended to be ok with her, talk to her ask her question.. just on one very day, she was saying about "If I had a kid that will behave like Jonathan, blah blah" (jonathan is my classmate), then I jokingly said "Teacher don't worry, you won't have a kid." After she heard me, SHE GOT FUCKING ANGRY, and said stuffs like you want a second pink form, and all this kind of stupid stuff. FIRST, it was a joke but she took it so seriously. Maybe because the joke, is actually a fact, and also I hit the nail on the head, she probably is infertile or something. SECONDLY, everyone like to make jokes at her expense but she took it as a joke, but for me, she didnt. FUCK. THAT IS FUCKING UNFAIR. From then on I just fucking gave her attitude, ponteng her lessons, and sleep at her lessons. I REALLY CANT FUCKING BOTHER SIA, chinese already suck, and with a teacher like that, HOW WORSE CAN IT GET?
Oh I forget to mention, she complained to my form teacher (who is also retarded) about the stuffs I did, and because of that, my form teacher got a bad impression of me. And do you know what, when I was returning me the report book, he told me "You can get to the top 5 in level, or even top 3, but it is not because of your studies, but because of the bad side of you," I gave the "yeah yeah blah", because seriously sia, because of those few shits... he actually thought that it affected my studies. Lame sia..

Irritating sia. The reason why I bought up this topic is just recently, theres so unreasonable people in my house.. I mean seriously. Whats wrong with people lah. My mother is already one of them, unreasonably taking my money. Then my sister is so fucking selfish, she wants everything her way, and when she flares up everyone must accomodate to her likings. Like most people do anyway. Then my father usually the most cocky one, he's like one of the people in my life that I acted to be OK with but actually I hate him like fuck. For ALOT (fuck at least 20) of GOOD reasons. Its quite sad lah, to have 3 pain in the ass people in my house. I should include another one which is my brother, who now I dont even talk to him at all, since last time, about 6 months ago. That makes it 4 out of 5 people in my family (the other person is me of course). I don't know why though, when people say you are stupid (zhiyang), unreasonable and unfair (the chinese teacher (hey I really said that to her face and she gave like 1000 excuses to prove me wrong, crazy sia)), selfish (sister), and blah blah, THEY ARE REFUSE TO ADMIT IT, AND LIKE FELT SO INSULTED BY IT. I mean seriously man, its some BLOODY FACT and yet they can't face it. Irritating as fuck, really.

I digressed a bit too much. I find blogging the best way to rant down all your emotions and stuffs, although it is just about temporary. It really doesn't matter if no one reads it at all (because probably half of them couldn't relate to you as much), it does help. I guess I want to write more post about those kind of things, something similar to Frank Yang, that writes his thought about a topic.

Where was I.. oh yeah.
I wanted to also say something about the newcomers. Well just yesterday (again), I was at castle, and at castle there was two guys. They seem to also know "pahcour" and I did see them do something, but when we came, they just watch only, which is irritating, but no choice. Well... the thing is, they actually already know me. I didn't know, I thought they were just some losers that saw it on youtube or TV then just try out for fun.. just didnt have a clue about it at all. Thing is, when I came home and about an hour later I saw a new comment in my youtube profile (denester). SHOCKINGLY, THEY FUCKING KNOW ME. Which scared the shit out of my life. Damn. First thing I felt was like, WTF MAN, am I that famous? Well in this case its nothing to be happy off, because well, I don't really want to be well known to those irritating poser or shit, if some media thing that will OK, but still I PREFER to get the attention of the people in UK.

Ok thats not the point. The reason why I felt like very irritated to know that they are actually real posers and stuffs is like, from experience (people like yuanhan, irritating stupid people like him), if I do those big stuffs, the posers will go like "WOW!! WAHHH!!" like Zhiyang and sometimes it feels irritating, when it comes from the posers. Sure if people did a big jump of what is does look impressive, but the natural thought that comes to my mind when people (especially posers or other retarded people) say WAH is that they are really poser-ish and stupid. Don't know if its just me though. Secondly, is that they will go "WAH TODAY I MET CP AND I SAW HIM DID THIS JUMP, THIS ONE, THAT ONE, THIS AND THAT AND THIS AND THAT!" and their friends will go "WAHHHHHHH!! I DON'T BELIEVE!! SIAOO!!" all those kind of poserish crap. The thing is, if no one thought of seeing a person do a move, they will either wont think of it, or will think of it but never think of doing it as its 'impossible'. But once they have seen a person, especially if that guy is "PRO" (FUCK I HATE THAT WORD), they will go wow first, then they will think it is so much more possible and will want to try that out next time, as their target or motivation. Irritating sia.

I've already realize this and I want to be original, and I don't see why must people keep following other people movement, and not find their own way. I just want to be able to do what I want to do, and find my own way. Its kinda stupid don't you think, to just copying everyone movement. Also thats another reason why I fear training with newcomers or just people I don't know or don't really like to be with. They will either ask you to do stuffs like "EHH CP CAN SHOW ME HOW YOU DO THIS LEH" and obviously go "WAHHHHHHHHHHH!" like Zhiyang always do again. Irritaing sia the feeling. I know of people who actually memorised everything in my video. Crazy sia.. I make videos not for the poser to watch and tell me to do again, but to at least try to get across in the UK, to spark some attention over there. I've been supporting and following the UK parkour scene for a long time already, and it will be a dream to train with Teghead, PhillyD and Ilabaca. Sadly things get all so wrong.

Thats why for the Bishan jam, I keep in mind (and warned some others as well) to not do too much and don't do anything big, because of the reasons stated. Sometimes if you do a big stuff, then newcomer will actually try it out and undoubtedly fail in that case. I will just teach when I need to, train abit when I need to, and film most of the time. Its like that.. you can stop them. But then there might still be a chance to find out a hidden potential traceur... but its a rare chance.
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Poser, what defines a poser? Sure Dblucy, me, and probably half of everyone started out like a total poser. To me, theres a slight difference between one that has potential, and one that obviously does it for the thrill. First, I think if they have the genuine passion and heart to the sport, as in the neverending willingness and inquisitiveness to ask questions and experiment with things, read out the philosophy and train by themselves and condition and all that. They will find their own motivation, and develop oneself.
The reason why I feel so irked to train with the LastBreathClan, or watch backpacktraceurs' video and hear that engineer's self-proclaimed 153 IQ's calculations is that, I've learnt my lesson, thanks to the very first newcomer that I trained with. He is none other than Yuanhan and the undisputed world's worst poser of all time (that is because he has all the qualities a fucking retarded poser will have, and more). I don't see why should I waste my precious time on those names stated above as in the end all those people who call you out to train, is just wanna see the big guys do big stuffs, and in turn sucking up to them, keep asking them to train with you and irritate you further, take advantage of you (I know Yuanhan had learnt alot from me, but fuck it, all of it has gone to waste thanks to his freaking retarded mindset and attitude), and just plainly wasting your time. You guys say it is definitely worth it to help them up as after all you are one of the posers that more or less is brought up by the other traceurs. Sure, but theres an easier way. Set up occasional big jams like in every 2 or 3 months, and from there spot out any potential ones, and call them down for a jam or something.
If I received any guys asking me questions in youtube or anywhere else, adding me to msn randomly, I might just help out, but then until a point where they got too much on my nerve then I give up. Or I can just choose an easier way out, just don't really care much, thats right, I think I will just don't care much.

Thats my point of view.

Now then I understand why Nazir choose to not go for jams like this, and not make videos of him, not to be easily contacted, or call to many people to come for his training, only his close friends. Also I understand why he wants to treat this people coldly, because he knows that if he instil fear among those newcomers, they will be scared and won't want to train with him (which could be good), and also if they come and he yell and them, those people who are angry with him are probably those people who don't have the spirit to train. I don't think his insults are totally personal unless the guy did something to him or what, and most of the time he is joking. That is why, I think he is very smart in handling such things. Also, the clips that he post in his accounts is how he set the standard so high, especially the Nazir wall, which I think to some guys still think its impossible.

Got nothing to say about this people. I really don't want to train with newcomers, or if its a big jam something like this than I won't train too much infront of them. I just wanna train with people that I'm close with and such. Learnt my lesson already. Then again, I won't want to not make videos just because of this stupid people. I just won't even think of entertaining them. I will just go for the big jams and see for any potential ones. Its quite easy to see.

I've got alot of things to think about and talk about, but I lost track of time and I'm tired now. I wonder if anyone reads my blog, if anyone is reading this right now, at least tag man! So I know someone actually bothers to read the boring content of my blog.

Stressation.

Nowadays I feel abit stress, over many things, feel like its really tiring to live. Few reasons, money, friends, trainings, school, time, myself, etc. I don't know how do I make myself less stress, I really need time out from trainings from the gym and really do what I like, movements. School is over, why am I actually stressing over them even though I've scored well? I don't know, next year's my majors and I'm really losing out the study mood, next year is would really be stressful. I'm really reluctant to spend money now because I really don't have money now, my parents always quarell over money, now theres economic probelms and so many other things, I always feel pain to even spend a dollar. Sucks man. And my friends in school, I really don't know if theres anyone who regard me as a proper friend, the feeling really sucks, but as long as no one really hates me, I should be happy enough. Time now is passing so fast, I think in almost a blink of an eye school reopens and it will really felt like what a fucking waste of time.

As you guys know I really, really wanna train properly in the holidays but one probelm. Around this time of the month, it always rains. Its kinda frustrating for that to happen, and I really wouldn't want to stay at home and not train even if it rains. I really need to work on my flips, because thats what I really suck at at the moment and I can't think of any other places that are suitable for learning flips. I really wanna train at prime but it will cost 15bucks + travel time. Sucks man, and then the other wise alternative would be the beach, yet again, troublesome (have to get wet and change), and kinda far as well. If it REALLY rains I'll just go to gym. Or train in the night.

The stuffs that I want to work on is wallpass and armjumps. The main thing is the stupid "JUMP UP 45degrees" thing. I always tend to jump way too forward ending up with so little height. This will definitely help in all aspect of movements, more so in running jumps and especially flips. I just wanna get my SDCs real consistent and powerful as well, and work on runs, to be real fluid in string of movements. I wanna get really good all-around, firstly in individual movements, then into real-time runs like showcased in my March 08 video. Work on my speed and power in movements, and also confidence and fluidity. I'll also want to work on my precision jumps, control. Thats about it. On training, I would try to make sure I don't do too much, just a quick good session of 1hour would be good enough, and of course not to do too much impactful stuffs, and not push my limits too much.

Strength training, left two weeks till I'll conclude the routine. 6 sessions more, and this will be really really tiring, as the intensity is so high right now, I'm almost maxing out, and right after that I can tell myself I'm no longer an 'intermediate' athletic anymore, and it will not be that easy for strength gains (I don't think I will be capable for weekly PRs after that). Right after that I will be deloading for like 3 weeks, then go there for practicing lifts like front squats and power cleans, deadlifts, just maintaining strength and probably protection, and definitely prevently atrophy. I wouldn't want to lose all my strength I've gain from the routine. I think I will start on another routine somewhere in January next year, when school starts. This is the time where I seriously concentrate on gaining strength and power. I want to see myself being able to squat a weight twice of my bodyweight, to be able to do an one arm chinup, and all the other feats. I wanna make a point to train my flips into 2nd nature, so I'll just do flips as and when I like during breaks or something.

Videos, ah yes. I will, make a movie-like video by the end of this year, and that would probably be the last video for a very long time, with the exception of the huge new years eve jam. For the year 2009 I will only make one video, that is my supposedly breakthrough video. Yet again as you've read, it will be yet again focusing way more on filming and editing more then movements. I wanna make this kind of a cinematography reel. A poor one, though. HAHA. I wonder what should I put as movements in the video. I guess some stuffs that I'm comfortable with. Don't really want to make it big and all. Probably will be using lotsa timelapse again (this time in HD), the signature for the May-July 08 video, and more style shots, and even some parts in a storyline.

I still ponder, should I train more alone, instead of infront of people and stuffs. Because I think I can focus way more, and not get distracted, or even do silly stuffs. I've said to the other guys that there will be mini-training sessions on saturdays, but I guess I'll just make one or two, just to get ready for the huge one at Clarke Quay. I really want to aim for improvement. Sometimes I don't understand why I want to make myself hit the squat rack, the motivation and discipline inside of me. I force myself to train despite my laziness and lethargy. I just want to improve myself, not knowing why. I guess it gives you a real sense of achievement, to see yourself improve and land a new move that you've never did before, or previously couldn't do, its something quite 'cool' to experience. Its definitely one of the best thing on Earth to progress. Also I really enjoy movements, it gives me freedom, to realize that in the world there is never a barrier that is too big or too scary to be deemed as impossible.

I've still alot of things to rant about. Once I get my bursary, I'm pretty certain that my mum we take about half of it. It really sucks man, to know that whatever you've worked hard for or at least something that is deservedly yours, is taken away from someone. First was Ang Pao money, then from my 400dollars overall work pay from MacDonalds (do you believe it? I've work so much, but I didn't even get to spend a single cent.), and now the Bursary. Fuck man, and she keep saying she will return. And whenever I rise the topic of it, she gets angry and say stuffs like "Parents cannot take money from son ah?", and she really really gets angry and gets to the mood of depression (usually act one lah like typical women, cry for sympathy.), and then just shout at everybody. I doubt she will even return me a cent, I swear. Pocket money is an obligation of a parent, and that is not counted as "returning the money you owe". Oh well cannot blame, as now the situation of my household is haywire, due to many probelms. Also whenever I ask for money back, they will go "what for you wanna have so much money for? don't spend so much money hor, nowadays we all no money already." Irritating sia. How am I even gonna get the things I want. Stupid man.

I can't really afford to waste anymore time right now, hais...

I guess I will be travelling around SG, to spots like Taman Jurong, Clementi, Bishan, Sengkang, Yishun, Jelapang, Pasir Ris, Clarke Quay, maybe some other places, mainly to expose myself to different environments (getting sick of Tampines, I will train there the next year when it is convenient), and to work on some unfinished business, including filming Ashton's showreel. I probably would just want to go there with just some people, not in a big group, and also get some footages from those trips.

Yet again I've rethinked about the statements I've written before. I'm a man of a mission as of that very day. Will I manage to achieve it? I guess, its time, that I'll prepare myself to attempt something, something of significance and extraordinary, which might be worthy enough to change my life. The time will come, I can already foresee it. 2010, my breakthrough year.